Mirage or Epiphany

The last time we spoke, I was weighing out this long distance concept and trying to make sense of the entire situation. Nothing has change surprisingly except that after mentioning my reservations, he has really step up to the plate. I was at work this week and having a real bad day. Every thing was piling down on me and I felt like quitting. Feeling like this is an anomaly and rarely happens. Nevertheless, when it does I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. It is hard trying to balance motherhood, school, and work and keeping sane all in one hat. I do it though and it takes very hard work. That is one of the things I like about myself is my perseverance. Let us not get unfocused today...I was sitting at my desk pondering my life and decided to pick up the phone to call Lamaris. Of course, he answers the phone on the first ring, which always makes me blush. I proceed to tell him all the gory details of my day and Of course, he just listens intently. He never utters a word until I am through making a fool of myself. After I'm done he says" Now do you feel better" and I reply no. After I hang up with him, I am a little more furious then before. How can he not understand and try to comfort me? Well why I am sitting there fuming, I get an email. Of course, its one of the most erotic poems I have ever heard. Of course, it is personalized with my name. Now my anger has melted and other more personal emotions evolved. I was meaning to thank him but I had to go into a meeting. While in my meeting, someone delivers something in the front but I cannot see what it is. After my meeting, I see the most gorgeous bunch of wild flowers that I have ever seen. Besides that, I notice that they were delivered from Zimilich Florist. Therefore, the secretary, very meanly and with added jealousy, I might add says, “they are for you”. I excitedly grab the card and who are they from...Well of course Lamaris. I am so overwhelmed with joy. I immediately called him and mush over what happened. After I get off work though, my excitement starts to fade a little. This is because I know when I get home Lamaris will not be there. My computer, cell phone or another cute text message but no warm body to put with it. I understand your concept but I must face reality and ask myself seriously, is this feeling a mirage or is my relationship just an epiphany...?